Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Brigitte Nagy, Age 30

Is the idea of having children something that you are open to, or were open to at some point in the past? Is the fact that you don’t have children the result of a deliberate decision or just the way your life happened to work out? If it was a deliberate decision, can you tell me something about how you made this choice, the circumstances, your reasons, whether it was easy, hard, etc.?

Deliberate decision. I have no interest in contributing to an overpopulated world by putting more life here when i can help those who are already suffering instead. Should I ever feel a maternal urge, which I do not presently, I would certainly attempt to adopt rather than pop out another little consumer.

What are the three most important factors that influenced your decision to be childfree? Do you enjoy being childfree? If so, why? If not, why not? Are there any bad things about being childfree? If so, what are they?

I enjoy it greatly! I prefer 4 legged animals to children, I enjoy my time alone and I also find most children today spoiled and bratty. This is generally their parents fault as they prefer to babysit them with television and video games in most cases. My 3 majoy factors are 1)I prefer other animals to the cruelty of humans. 2)I do not believe in contributing to the earth's overpopulation and 3)My husband and I do not need children to feel fulfilled as we have many other interests and enough nieces and nephews around us!lol

Please describe the kinds of reactions you have received from others in response to your not having children. How supportive and accepting have your friends and family been? How accepting do you feel society as whole is of the voluntarily childless ("childfree") lifestyle? Do you feel childfree individuals suffer from unfairness, prejudice or discrimination in society? Do you feel there are common misconceptions about childfree individuals or the childfree lifestyle?

Luckily my twin sister and my father are extremely intelligent and both understand and agree with my reasons.Unfortunately most ppl today are extremely prejudiced against non breeders and almost hostile towards my own choice. I deal with discrimination for this on a daily basis, esp as I work in an office athmosphere where women seem to live only for overpriced weddings and reproduction.These ppl perceive us as lazy, immature or psychologically damaged, all of which are is a very difficult thing to be child free after 30 and be respected for this!

In retrospect, how do you feel about your decision to be childfree? Do you still feel the same way as always on this issue? To date have you had any regrets? Do you think you may have regrets later in life? Is there any possibility you may change your mind about having children at some point?

I have no regrets at all and do not think I will ever change my opinions on the uncessary breeding of more and more humans in our overpopulated world. My only regret is that no dr will agree to "fix" me as I have not popped out anything...altho this country readily taxes my tax dollars to feed an ever increasing number of welfare mothers every year...

Have you had any childfree role models during your life? Please explain.

I have had many childfree idols who have chosen to devote their lives to animals, who I believe are far more vulnerable and loving than humans. Or all those who have chosen adopting and or fostering over "biological" children. I truly admire these people and believe the world would be a far better place if more ppl did this and embraced the castoffs we so ruthlessly abandon, rather than insist on having "another little me".

When you compare your life to the lives of women you know who have children (family, friends, co-workers), how would you evaluate the advantages, disadvantages, and overall life satisfaction associated with each kind of lifestyle?

I am far more satisfied with my life than many ppl altho some parents seems happy as well.I do not condemm them for their choices while I am ironically vilified daily for mine. All in all I believe I am far more realistic than many of thee ppl, esp young parents and those who do not realize the immensity of parenthood's responisbilities.

Do you perceive that there are any dominant messages expressed in our culture about having children? If so, what are they?

Yes, Young girls are constantly pushed by media, fashion and even their school programs, to get married and have babies. Very little has changed despite women's liberation. I see this with my nieces and I am very glad I do not have a little girl of my own!

Do you feel these messages are for the most part accurate, inaccurate, misleading or something else? Please explain.

I find they they are insulting and prevent young women from exploring their interests and other aspects of life. It seems that all they care about now are boyfriends and having babies, usually as a means of keeping said boyfriends.

Have any parents ever spoken to you about the "downside" of having children or told you if they had to go back and do it all over again, they wouldn't have kids? Have any parents expressed that they are jealous of you for being childfree? If so, please describe the conversation(s).

My father is luckily very happy that we are not reproducing in this world and has told me this many times. My mother is not in a mental state to really comprehend such complicated issues. Most parents I know either do not understand my reasoning and think I am simply pessimistic and will change my mind or, a few responsible, intelligent ones do understand. In most of these cases they also do not wish for more than one child.

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